A Successful-Happy...

The weekend proved to be a good test of my new-found goal at happiness. I do think I faired quite well. It felt a much like a roller coaster though. There were moments when I felt pleased with myself and with my surroundings and moments when I succombed to the temptation to want beyond my current surroundings.

I started off by writing my list on Friday and hoping I could make the very best of all my weekend time - minus a male presence of course. I was quickly thrown back when an opportunity to be around a male presented itself and then was quickly taken away. For a moment I felt wanted, and as always that brings me to a sense of happiness. I have such a hard time being in on Fridays. I hate sitting alone watching the time pass. Truly, where does this come from? I have spent so many Friday and Saturday nights pissed off at my loneliness. Who says I have to be out doing something??

This time, I made a choice... I will ask someone and get the hell out. Mindful of the fact I won't go out alone, I looked to my best friend. She works on Fridays and Saturdays... which always makes this navagation a bit difficult. But I called anyway. I coerced her into going out after she got off work at 9pm. I offered to take her to the bar where she can ride the bull. Honestly... I think it's the stupidest damn thing and only the prettiest of the pretty can pull this damn thing off looking hott. I am not one of them.

We danced for nearly four hours instead of the planned two hours. I had my piece of happiness back... minus the male. Go me! :) She was slow to start dancing but I won her over... and we eventually even climbed up onto the speakers to be on show for all to see. I loved it... hit two items of my happiness list at once... yipee! I did feel spells of longing just to have someone dancing with me, but I shook them off and reminded myself just the dancing was enjoyment enough. I even found a new dance I'm totally into... called the Cupid Shuffle. I had to turn and watch others since this was only my second time hearing it, but it was a blast!

Saturday, I lounged around my apartment and ran around doing some errands. Until I got a call from my cousin hoping to come over again. We ended up joining a party across the apartment courtyard. There was probably more alcohol involved than I think is really needed. But I got to meet some new people and be social... again, it was a very enjoyable evening.

Sunday, I spent a few hours lounging by the pool and swimming. God, it was glorious! I love everything about swimming! It feels good and its healthy, how could you go wrong? I went home to cook something I had never made before. Penne with Vodka Sauce... and yes, it came out yummy!

I don't know how long I'll be strong. Today I feel lonely. I keep wondering why my phone is not vibrating, why no one is thinking of me. I'm trying to remind myself how unnecessary this concern is and how silly I am being. But... in the name of honesty, I'm having a hard time avoiding the feelings. So I already tried to book a date with my roommate for the gym this evening. I'm trying to focus on my work and keep my mind occupied with music.

All-in-all, I think It was a good weekend. But can I keep it up?? ...wish me luck!